Terms
Last updated 14 August 2026
Sofa Power is not selling anything yet. Until it is, this site is a brochure and a mailing list, and these terms cover only that. Terms of sale — payment, shipping, returns — will be published here before the first order is taken.
The joke and the product
The branding is comedy. The formulation is not. Where this site describes what is in the tub — 5 g of creatine monohydrate and 35 g of pea protein per 50 g serving — those figures are meant literally and we intend to be held to them. Where it implies that sitting on furniture produces muscle, it does not.
Health claims
Statements on this site marked with an asterisk have not been evaluated by the Food and Drug Administration. This product is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure or prevent any disease. Nothing here is medical advice. If you are pregnant, nursing, under 18, taking medication, or managing a kidney condition, talk to a doctor before taking creatine.
Pricing
The $39.99 launch price is what we intend to charge and what we will hold for people on the launch list. It is not yet an offer you can accept, and until the store opens it can change.
Reviews on this site
The quotes on the home page are illustrative pre-launch copy, not testimonials from real customers, and they are labelled as such in the footer. Once real customers exist, real reviews will replace them.
Our stuff
The Sofa Power name, the packaging, the photography and the text on this site belong to us. The jokes are, regrettably, also ours.